Christians: Admit That Prayer Doesn’t Work

A few days ago, an unhinged madman went to church and shot a bunch of people.

This is now the second most common church event after the song, “Good Good Father”.

Malevolent evil used to inspire sympathy.

When Americans encountered incomprehensible wickedness…we turned to God.

We’re smarter now.

The light of secular rationality has scattered the shadow of religious superstition.

It would be unusual to specifically pray to NOT be murdered in church but let’s set that aside.

The jig is up, Christians.

It’s time to admit that prayer doesn’t work.

We’ve known it for a long time, haven’t we?

Be honest.

We prayed (secretly) in school that we’d pass tests without studying.

We prayed for a single movie with a religious character who wasn’t a dim-wit.

We prayed that Christianity would not be represented in the media by Westboro Baptist Church.

We prayed for a late-night television host who possesses at least a kindergarten understanding of theology.

We prayed that Bill Nye would leave television once and for all.

We prayed that Neil De Grasse Tyson would follow Bill Nye.

We prayed that it would be legal to hang the Ten Commandments on a courthouse wall.

We prayed that Barack Obama would lose to Mitt Romney.

We prayed to keep our insurance if we liked our insurance.

We prayed for politicians who aren’t constantly campaigning for re-election.

We prayed for a wall between the US and Mexico.

We prayed for just one news organization to acknowledge that Islam is different from Christianity.

We prayed to be delivered from the sermons of self-righteous atheists like Wil Wheaton.

Yes…We prayed that innocent lives would not be snuffed by violence…

…like abortion.

And we got nothin’.

Obviously, prayer doesn’t work.

So what should we do?

Write more laws, I guess.


When praying, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. (Mt 6:7–8)

7 thoughts on “Christians: Admit That Prayer Doesn’t Work

  1. Brad says:

    Sorry- my hope will always be with God and I’ve seen prayer work. Living in a broken world but, and we were created with free will and not to be puppets. Part of that is dealing with the bad and evil while always trusting in the good. I will always be a warrior for the good and positive. No one will steal my joy.

  2. Nathan S says:

    My daughter asked me for a cell phone.
    I didn’t give it to her.
    My son asked to play video games on school nights.
    I didn’t let him.
    My daughter asked for dessert after every meal.
    I denied this request.
    If I, being a decent Father, know how to give my kids what they need, how much more should God, with vision not bound by time nor space, be able to give to us what we need in the grand scheme of things. (Matt. 7:9-11)
    The Bible is replete with examples of righteous people suffering at the hands of evil, so this is not new. It is only because of the larger picture that we can have hope.

  3. Dave says:

    Wil Wheaton was certainly guilty of breaking “Wheaton’s Law”.

    Nice to see that he got called on it by some friends who do not share his views on faith and prayer.

    I have to give him at least a few “props” on calling out the rabid atheist militants.

    But really…. “Shut up Wesley!”

    (No skinny jeans were harmed in the creation of this post)

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