Announcing that you hold grudges is a concise way of letting me know that you’re not a good friend. If you had this comment printed on a T-shirt, it would save me the time and energy of getting to know you.

In case you have an attitude adjustment in the future that allows you to think about other people for a microsecond, I’ll tell you why this sentiment is so repugnant.

First: You are not qualified to redefine what it means to hold a grudge. Your hardened heart is to blame for that grudge; not me. Suggesting that your hatefulness is honest discernment is simply ugliness pretending to be virtue.

Second: You don’t want me to treat you like you’re treating me. Nobody likes when grudges are held against them. You want to be forgiven for your offenses. You want your bad behavior to be left behind. When you hold a grudge, you’re not loving your neighbor as you love yourself.

Third: Your grudge is sucking up all the energy that should be going toward self-improvement. Holding on to bitterness won’t fix my problems but it will certainly multiply yours.

Holding grudges is a character flaw. Stop trying to justify your hatefulness. Ask God to forgive you and he will. He never holds a grudge even though he’s seen you for who you are.

‘Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.’

(Leviticus 19:18)