Everyone struggles to shed their belief in Santa Claus. In your childhood, flying reindeer and elf-powered toy factories seem plausible. Then, you grew-up and recognized the problems inherent in the One Guy and A Sleigh Distribution System . You cast Santa aside in favor of more rational theories to explain the arrival of Christmas gifts. But doubt lingers, doesn’t it?

Luckily, the Universe has assembled a book to help you keep disbelieving in Santa. It’s a challenging, thrilling and revelatory book that will remind you how smart you are to not believe crazy stuff. If you’ve ever felt uncertainty creep into your mind when you see Santa ringing a bell for the Salvation Army, get this book!

It answers some of the most profound questions human beings confront:

• Where do toys come from if they’re not manufactured in Santa’s workshop?
• Why can’t Santa go through a window on houses with no chimney?
• How could all that stuff fit on a single sleigh?
• Can a reindeer nose actually emit light?
• Why do we return Christmas gifts to Wal-Mart instead of the North Pole?

Be honest. Questions like these continue to haunt you. There’s no shame in admitting it. Disbelief in Santa is difficult. Western culture is steeped in Santa superstition and you’re persecuted for your lack of belief. You lie awake wondering if your non-belief is valid. Take heart! You can finally be certain that Santa Claus is fiction!

Atheism is the religion of fools. Their claims of “non-belief” are contradicted by dozens of books explaining their beliefs. Genuine disbelief is easy. I don’t need a book encouraging me to keep doubting Santa Claus. Atheists reduce God to Santa Claus then write condescending books about how He doesn’t exist. I hope every atheist buys a copy of this book. They deserve to be 30 bucks poorer.