The science is settled.

Climate change is a reality.

It says so in the Bible.*

The climate used to be perfect.

Life on Earth was eternal.

…back when there were only 2 people emitting carbon.

Then people built a factory.

(Historical records don’t support my factory building claim.

…but sin is sin…

…eat from the tree of knowledge…

…enlarge your carbon footprint…

…Let’s not quibble.)

And then people died.

Because the world was flooded.

And that’s some crazy, dangerous weather!

Some of you will say,

“Hey Stupid! Climate is not weather!”

First: No need for name calling.

Second: I see your point and will rephrase.

People died.

Because the whole world was flooded.

And that’s some crazy, dangerous climate!

The point is: the weather climate changed.

…and humans were responsible!

The change was catastrophic.

Earth used to be an eternal paradise.

Now it’s hard to stay alive for even 90 years.

This hostile environment has claimed most of my family.

The remaining few are showing signs of wear and tear.

We won’t last much longer.

That’s what the science says, anyway.

And the science is settled.

*Some of you may object to Bible references, claiming them to be unscientific. Don’t be hasty. The Bible supports the notion that Earth was, at one time, a great place to live. Without this historical evidence there is no reason to think our planet ever was anything other than what it is now. When you suggest that the climate has changed, I gotta ask, “Changed from what?”