There was a kid in our school named Dan. Actually, there were several kids named Dan but I’m talking about one specific Dan because I bullied him a lot. I wasn’t a big, aggressive kid. I didn’t assault him physically. Instead, I battered him with insults.

I mocked Dan all the time. I made fun of his hair, his clothes, the way he walked, the way he sat, even his eyes (because they were too close together). Sometimes I would read insult books (I’m not even kidding) so I could launch professionally edited hate speech at Dan. I insulted Dan’s mother a lot even though I had never met her. When I found a great insult, I used in on Dan – even if it didn’t apply. Truth wasn’t important. What mattered was making the other kids laugh so they would like me.

At some point, I can’t remember exactly when, I realized that I was a wretched, insufferable douche. Dan was just an average kid. He wasn’t particularly short, stupid, ugly, clumsy, stinky, dirty, poor, or unlikeable. He wasn’t Irish at all. (Several of the best insults from the books were about Irish people.) In other words, Dan didn’t have a problem – I did.

I can’t say I spent much time feeling ashamed. I was just a kid without the capacity to process regret. What happened was – I just stopped picking on Dan. I lost interest in berating him. I can’t say the two of us became best buddies but we had a couple of conversations in High School about some topic I don’t recall. Neither one of us threw a punch…

Today I’m grateful for whatever epiphany brought my insipid bullying to my attention. As an adult (or as close as I’m ever going to get to that) I’m keenly aware that not everyone outgrew their bullying. For some people, the bully bloom never fell off the rose. Maybe you’re one of those people.

You say things so other people will approve of you. It doesn’t matter whether your words are true or not, what matters is their impact. You’re desperate for attention. You’ll say whatever it takes to hear the crowd applaud. You’ll hurt anyone – ANYONE – to gain your tribe’s acceptance. Maybe this will be your epiphany.

The object of your vitriolic hatred doesn’t have a problem – you do. It’s impossible that anyone – ANYONE – deserves your relentless criticism. No politician, teacher, billionaire, businessperson, news anchor, celebrity, or preacher is perfectly evil. You really don’t know much about that person you’re attacking. So grow up.

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27 Responses

          1. That was probably the most 5 year olds thing I’ve said in a very long time

          2. Nice set of agism JB and Amanda. I still haven’t seen evidence of your god. Other than the fact that you kill your children when they misbehave.

            How’d I do?

  1. I don’t think insulting somebody is equivalent to bullying. There is an element of piling on that is essential to the concept, adding more pain to an already defeated person. This is one reason the concept doesn’t map well onto politicians as targets of abuse. Whatever the merits of such behavior, the concept of bullying someone distorts the subject.

  2. hmm, well, JB, you still try to be insulting and a bully. You just don’t succeed anymore. And nice lies again, but that’s what I expect, from fellows who think it’s “funny” to be misogynistic. as for “giving up on me”, well, that might be true if you stopped responding and weren’t writing to the “goddless goons” (nice name calling) every day rather than trying to lie that you lost interest “a while back”. JB: I do not have hte words to express how grateful I am for your commentary” dated July 8, 2019 I guess self-examination isn’t something you do often, JB. 😉

      1. Not at all. Now, Jack, you should ask JB why he doesn’t block me. It’s very easy to do. One could postulate that he wants to make Christians look bad by his actions and I help by pointing them out.

        1. LOL!
          You’re on the money!
          Every comment you make is another nail in the coffin of Christianity.

          1. I suppose it can’t be a conversion if a didn’t process my belief. I beat Vel to the punch.

          2. Yep, I know, JB. Since you aren’t a Christian, this is why you let me post here. We’re both happy atheists, much to the surprise of your audience. When you said your audience wasn’t bright, I knew you weren’t a Christian and were just playing them for money.

        2. Best. Comment. Ever. 😀

          Hurry and block Vel before she makes Christianity look even worse. LOL!

          1. “That pleasant atheist woman is so reasonable and eloquent. She’s convinced me there is no God.” – Every One of My Readers

    1. No. I’ve given up on her. Atheism is dreadfully dull and I lost interest in writing to the godless goons awhile back. This was written to people who still have the ability to self examine.

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