I’ve never seen a live unicorn.

Not saying they don’t exist.

Relax, Bronies.

I’ve just never seen one.

Never seen a three year old child with low self esteem.

Not saying they don’t exist.

Wait.

Yes, I am.

Someone posted a picture of a three year old girl

with a caption underneath that read:

“At three, teach her self love and acceptance.”

Um…why not teach her to pee in the potty?

She already knows self love.

Babies are born chock-full of the stuff!

The moment they draw breath, their personal needs

…become their sole priority.

They’ve zero regard for their parents.

At birth, they are perfect role models for self love.

By age three, they are seventh-level black belt self lovers.

Demanding the world yield to their whims.

Unfettered by shame, humility or empathy.

Teaching children to love themselves is like teaching a duck to swim.

What they need to learn is a little self loath.

(The children.  Not the ducks.)

That doesn’t come naturally at all.

Children don’t pick it up from phrases like,

“Mommy is sorry you’re unhappy! Please stop screaming! Pretty please?”

“You’re my special angel, even when you throw cereal on the floor!”

“You bit everyone at preschool? What did they do to upset you?”

I’ve seen lots of toddlers oblivious to their bratty-ness.

Self loath isn’t innate.

It must be learned.

But it can only be learned if it’s taught.

And it’s only taught by grown-ups who love kids.

Telling a kid,

“You’re a good person no matter what you do”

isn’t loving.

It won’t turn them into grown-ups.

They’ll just become bigger, older babies.

(AKA: Progressive Liberals)

And the only way a grown-up baby can be useful

…is by riding a unicorn.

Discipline your son, for in that there is hope;

do not be a willing party to his death.

Proverbs 19:18