I’m an optimistic pessimist. I believe that no matter how bad things get here on Earth, they can always get worse. The downward spiral of mankind’s collective soul will continue. Greed, violence, selfishness, and injustice will increase. And yeah, people are gonna die. Things are going to get much, much worse for Earthlings. Earthlings are correct to be pessimists.

I’m optimistic because I’m not an Earthling. I’m a Christian so I’m a citizen of Heaven. This planet isn’t my final destination. When things get so bad that I can’t survive on this world anymore, I’ll leave. And I won’t even think about this place anymore (no offense.)

In the meantime, I’ve got to find something to do to occupy my time. Many people have asked, “How are you surviving this COVID thing?” Right now, answer is, “I’m living on savings.” Before the pandemic, I was traveling regularly to perform at churches, comedy clubs, and corporate events. Since February of 2020, I’ve done 2 paying shows. So my savings is dwindling, the COVID protocols are being extended, and I have no idea how much longer I’m supposed to stick around on this planet.

Some people have suggested I apply for unemployment. I qualify for several government assistance loans that I wouldn’t have to pay back (which means…they aren’t really ‘loans’.) I am not going to do that. Income from governmental welfare is not sustainable. There is no such thing as “free money.” I’m opposed to socialism, even when it benefits me personally.

I’m not willing to sit home and “wait for things to improve.” Because I don’t think things will “improve.” It seems unlikely that the demand for live performances will return. Event planning is risky. State Governors have demonstrated they will shut down social activity on a whim. When your event gets canceled, you lose money. The obvious way to avoid losing money is to stop scheduling live events.

So I’m assuming I will never do another live show for the rest of my life. Maybe I’m wrong. That would be fantastic! I’d love to be completely wrong! But my optimistic pessimism forces me to expect the worst. Given that expectation, I’m planning to change gears.

I’m building a stupendous, super-fun, super-exclusive group of people who refuse to go down without a laugh. God gave us comedy as a weapon to use against suffering, oppression, fear, and injustice. If you’re tired of responding to life’s horrors with mere tears or outrage, ‘The Comedy Clique‘ is for you.

And if you’re a person who often drinks room temperature beverages, there’s NEVER been a better time to join the clique! While supplies last, members of The Comedy Clique are entitled (yes, entitled) to purchase this exquisite SCQS Kooz (pronounced ‘Skews Kooz’)! It’s even possible to get one of these things for FREE. This is NOT AVAILABLE to the plebeians outside our clique.

To answer the question, “How am I surviving COVID?” I’m sending drink koozies to people who support my comedy. This simple drink insulator is a symbol of optimism. We will overcome sorrow with joy. We will choose to laugh. Please consider becoming a SCQS Kooz owner.

Click below to learn how you can join the Comedy Clique.