American Airlines flight #77 is a country.
“What? No it isn’t.”
Just play along. I’m making a point.
“I hate when you do this.”
I’ve got all the proper paperwork to enter the country.
“What country?”
American Airlines flight #77! I just said that!
“Right. You’ve got the paperwork. Go on.”
I’ve got no criminal record.
“Good for you.”
I have no ties to ISIS organizations.
“Congratulations.”
I am a tax-paying citizen who was born right here in the U.S.A.
“God bless America.”
But when I try to enter American Airlines flight #77…I get treated like a terrorist!
“Really?”
I’m delayed by the long line at security.
“That’s not…”
My personal property is searched.
“Well…”
I’m not allowed to have a cup of coffee! Last I checked, coffee doesn’t explode!
“I think…”
It’s de-humanizing and wicked! And it’s against the Geneva Convention!
“I think…you’re overreacting.”
Hmph. You must have voted for Trump!
“It’s reasonable to check people before they enter a plane…”
Country.
“Yeah. To protect the other people in the country.”
Even if it delays boarding? Even if I have to throw away my Starbucks?
“Yeah. That’s how it goes.”
Ok. Should we also check refugees coming into this country?
“NO! WE ARE A NATION OF IMMIGRANTS! STOP THE HATE! END ISLAMOPHOBIA!”
Good talk. Can I buy you some coffee?
7 Responses
East Chicago and Gary seem like safe places.
~CQW
Being from a neighboring state, I am thankful for the added security to keep us all from the dreaded threat of Hoosiers. We all must be protected from the horror that is the home of the Pacers, Gaithers, and the sham of Andrew Luck’s smoke and mirrors skill set. Come to think of it, Sandy Patty has always looked quite suspicious…
🙂
Dearest cousin, the scene you have played out here is spot on. But let’s take it one or two steps further. They made you take off your shoes. They made you throw away your coffee. They looked through all of your stuff.
Then, they make you wait in line for 18-24 months while they vet you by looking into every connection you’ve ever had to every human ever. Now it’s two years later, and they call your name. You walk up to the counter, and they say, “thank you for your patience. You have passed our airport screening with flying colors. You will be boarding in a few minutes.” You stand in line. You take your ticket to the door. Then, a call comes in. The attendant answers it. “Yes, I see,” she says into the phone. She calls your name again. “I’m sorry, sir, but we are no longer allowing anyone from Indiana to fly due to possible threats coming from those residing in that particular state.” “But I waited 2 years,” you say. “But I passed your tests,” you say. “But my family left from Indiana just last week,” you say. “Sorry, Mr. Branyan. Starting today, anyone from Indiana is banned from boarding this country. There’s nothing I can do.”
Yep.
If Indiana becomes an incubator for terrorists, it’s gonna suck for me. I’m gonna lose my frequent flyer status for sure.
But I totally understand why it’s necessary to keep the rest of you safe. And there is every reason to believe that the restrictions on my immigration will not be permanent.
I’ll take the bus for six months.
I hope you’re right. Because I can’t come to Indiana to visit you, for fear they may not let me back out. (Don’t tell anyone else, but as you know, I’m from Indiana too, but got out before the ban.)
Stop the music! This party’s OVER!
Boom!
Oh…. wait. I was just sayin’ that was a good artic…. what’s that in your hand?
Hey. No. Don’t taze me, bro!!!!