Lots of bickering about “The Wall”.

Donald Trump promised he would build it if he got elected President.

In my opinion, that was a mistake.

Trump knew lots of people hated him.

He knew these people would oppose everything he suggested.

If “The Wall” was a top-priority, he shouldn’t have admitted it.

Here’s what he SHOULD have said in his speech from the Oval Office:

My fellow Americans, it’s time to dismantle our borders. America is a country of immigrants, not Americans. Let’s stop pretending that we’re better than everyone else and welcome foreigners, aliens, indigents, criminals, and terrorists without judgment. No more borders! No more hate! Walls are immoral. I stand opposed to anything that hinders people coming into our country.

The Democrats would immediately vote to build “The Wall”.

Sadly, it’s too late now.

Trump tipped his hand so that won’t work.

But I have another (brilliant) idea that is still viable.

The Speaker of The House told us that walls are immoral.

So let’s build a moat.

That’s waaaaaaaay cooler than a wall anyway!

Imagine a 30-feet deep, 2000 mile long groove between the US and Mexico.

We fill it with water, piranha, crocodiles, electric eels, and swans.

Yes, swans.

(Swans with chicks are savage.)

Then, when illegal immigrants attempt to enter the US, instead of encountering an ugly, immoral wall…

…they’ll be eaten.

I’ve already written a speech for Donald Trump that virtually guarantees “The Moat” will become reality.

My fellow Americans, the last thing I would ever want to see happen is for the United States to dig a moat along the southern border.

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4 Responses

  1. Two things: though I doubt you would take the job, Trump should have hired you as an advisor. Or at least hired this blog post as an advisor.

    Secondly, why he hasn’t figured out yet that all he has to do is play the opposite game to get what he wants passed is evidence that he’s either not smart enough to do that (and/or has people around him not smart enough) or he knows it would work and just likes trolling everyone.

    1. A third option is he knows Washington is mostly populated by nitwits. When he stood opposed to “The Wall”, the morons in Congress would let it drop and focus all their energy on turning your backyard into a Sanctuary City.

  2. You really need to warn people that they should not be drinking, eating, or in need of a bathroom visit before reading these posts.

    I was ok but I’m concerned for others.

    This kind of intelligent hilarity is dangerous.

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