pizza on brown wooden board

The people who practice the religion of Secularism don’t have weekly meetings to help them keep up with the death of their dogmas This is why the zealous preachers of lawlessness continue to spew arguments into my comment section that were dismantled decades ago.

As a courtesy to you hapless humanists, I’ll explain why you should stop saying, “I don’t believe in your god the same way you don’t believe in anyone else’s.” If you like pizza, you’re going to love this! (If you don’t like pizza, you have deeper problems than I can help you solve.)

Imagine you arrange to have a pizza delivered and when it arrives you discover it is covered with fish gravel. You didn’t order fish gravel so you complain to the delivery driver who tells you he didn’t make the pizza, he just delivered it. So you drive to the pizza shop to render a complaint in person.

Working at the pizzeria there is a rose bush, a Yorkshire terrier, a squid, a mechanical pitching machine, a pair of bowling shoes, and a 1-month-old child (who is asleep). The floor in the kitchen is littered with fish gravel. About this time, I come into the pizza shop (because I’m saving $2 by picking up my pizza instead of having it delivered) and you tell me your tale of woe.

“The delivery driver swears he didn’t make this pizza,” you fume. “But none of these things in the kitchen could be responsible! The delivery guy must have done it!”

“Nonsense,” I say with a smirk. “I don’t believe in your delivery guy the same way you don’t believe in those other pizza makers.”

Do you understand the problem?

Just because there are many wrong answers doesn’t mean there are zero correct answers. You’re holding a pizza in your hands. It had to come from somewhere. Denying that is just foolish.

If you don’t understand my point, please mock religion in the comments (preferably with a picture).

(2 Peter 3:3)…in the last days scoffers will come, scoffing and following their own evil desires. They will say, “Where is this ‘coming’ he promised? Ever since our fathers died, everything goes on as it has since the beginning of creation.” But they deliberately forget that long ago by God’s word the heavens existed and the earth was formed out of water and by water.

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Three Little Pigs

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One Response

  1. I wonder if your secular guy, that fellow trying to save $2 is going to get any pizza. If he doesn’t even believe in delivery guy, who is going to make his pizza?

    It is amazing how many people refuse to deny the logic of cause and effect.

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