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If you don’t believe the Bible is true, then you shouldn’t try to support your views on abortion with scripture. It’s mildly amusing (not hilarious) that I need to make that statement. The internet has a robust population of religious know-it-alls who lecture me on how to apply the Bible to my life while simultaneously proclaiming the whole book to be a work of fiction.

Recently, an atheist presented me with a short list of scripture references which supposedly prove that God is not only okay with abortion, but he actually commands it sometimes. The person who posted the scripture then proceeded, without any sense of irony, to scold me for cherry-picking bible verses to support my pro-life position.

The pagans wants me to keep my religion to myself. The most offensive thing I ever do is “force my beliefs” on other people. These same heretics do not hesitate to force their interpretation of my beliefs on me. In a spectacular display of obtuse hypocrisy, ex-Christians demand that I adhere to doctrines they smugly reject themselves. Their pro-choice argument is, “The bible says abortion is okay. I’m too smart to believe what the bible says but you’re not because you’re a Christian.”

Scripture says that I’m to be prepared to give a reason for my faith (1 Peter 3:15). Some folks think that means I’ve got to listen to endless blather from obnoxious non-believers. I’m supposed to make winsome conversation with rude nitwits. If you think God has called you to serve as a punching bag for the godless, I have no criticism for you. Go forth and be abused!

I’m called to serve a different purpose.

The unredeemed wretch has nothing to teach me. A fool quoting scripture is still a fool and I would become a fool myself if I let a non-believer tell me what to believe. When you tell me you don’t believe the bible is true, you’ve told me that you have nothing I need.

(Matthew 7:6) “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces.”

Christian Comedy for Hire

If you like my blog even a little bit, then you should know I do Christian Comedy live shows! It’s all the faith and fun you read here, but on stage, it’s even more hilarious. Hire me for your next corporate bash, church event, or school function, and let’s make it a night of laughs with my unique brand of Christian Comedy!

three little pigs

Three Little Pigs

Three Little Pigs in Shakespeare is available as a children’s book. Get the illustrated story based on my viral comedy routine from Amazon.  Makes a great gift for the word-lovers in your life. 

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One Response

  1. You know how people have a “life verse?” I’ve decided that is my “divorce verse” as he basically took all I gave him and tossed it. Thank you, John, for the inspiration! Now if you’ll excuse me, I still have a life to live for my Savior Who has promised to never leave. He is faithful and I can find joy in knowing Him & His promises, despite my circumstances. Oh, and this was a great post about unbelievers and not being their punching bag! Same is true of fake Christians; better off without them.

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