I made this New Year’s resolution back in 1993:

“I won’t make any more New Year’s resolutions.”

I’m proud to say that I have kept that resolution.

But it hasn’t been easy.

I’m tempted almost every day to make important life changes…

…next year.

That’s what New Year’s resolutions are for!

I resolve to eat less junk food in 2017…

…then celebrate my healthy decision by eating a bag of mini Mounds bars.

A resolution is just a good intention.

But not for today.

For next year!

Next year I’ll start doing all the stuff I should be doing now.

Today, I’ll reward myself for declaring to be better later on.

Drink some champagne!

(I’m resolving to give up alcohol.)

Sing some songs!

(I’m resolving to learn to play guitar.)

Ring in the New Year!

Tonight, let’s congratulate each other for our list of glorious goals.

We salute our future selves for everything we plan to accomplish.

Things are going to be different next year!

Or by 2018 at the latest.

For sure!

Probably!