Dear Social Media Activist,
Keep up the good work! Your outrage is improving people’s lives!
Somewhere far above your tax bracket, human beings just like you (but with tons of money, power, and privilege) are benefiting from your efforts. You’re really making a difference!
By reacting instantly and emotionally to whatever appears in your timeline, you save powerful people the trouble of persuasion. When you assume every headline is completely true, busy billionaires don’t need to provide evidence. This frees up time for important activities like hoarding wealth, yacht maintenance, and making sure young people can’t buy a house.
Your constant fury online is money in the bank for aristocrats. Every moral flare fired into the stream puts a little money in somebody’s pocket. Anger gets clicks which are essential for maintaining mansions, staffing vacation homes, and funding legacies for rich folk’s grandchildren.
Keep obsessing over places where you do not live and situations you cannot affect. Emotional investment from a distance is the best form of participation you can offer. Your method of ‘support’ doesn’t disrupt anything. That brings peace of mind to society’s upper tier.
And keep treating isolated events as proof of total civilization collapse. Believing that a single frame of video is all you need to fully understand events that you didn’t witness really helps build a secure future for the affluent.
Don’t stop risking your life by actively engaging armed law enforcement. That’s a level of courage the wealthy simply don’t possess. While you’re out there collecting rubber bullets and criminal records, the ruling class can have brunch. Your willingness to get arrested, beaten, or worse lets them accomplish their goals without missing a Pilates class. You bleed, they succeed, and everyone wins!
Stay plugged into the news feed to fuel despair. Your eagerness to destroy your own mental health for the benefit of others is genuinely moving, especially since the people you’re helping don’t even know you exist. You give freely, expecting nothing in return, and you get exactly that. A true success story! Cynics might call you a chump, but pay them no mind. They don’t know the satisfaction that comes from helping others achieve their goals.
So keep it up, noble activist! Every angry video and hysterical comment is doing real, meaningful good for someone.
(Proverbs 10:13) On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense.
