Guys,

Are you shacking-up with a girl?

Planning to get married someday?

One question:

“Are you insane?”

There is no reason to marry a girl who will live with you.

She shares your bed.

She shares her money.

She’s responsible for any children you produce.

All this costs you nothing.

Zilch.

Just say, “I love ya, baby.”

A single, empty promise and you own her!

Get married, and she legally owns 50% of you!

And 50% is almost HALF.

That’s nuts!

You’re risking half your stuff to get EXACTLY what you’re already getting!

Your “Shacklet” (a term of endearment) may get uppity sometimes.

She may start demanding that you ‘commit to the relationship’.

Just give her a cheap ring.

You can even use your Shacklet’s money to buy it.

She will believe the ring represents your deep, eternal love.

And she’ll stop pestering you!

If she doesn’t, get rid of her.

When a girl keeps insisting you marry her, it means she’s figured you out.

She’s wise to your scam.

She’s smart.

That’s bad.

Move in with stupid girls and don’t ever marry them.

After all…

…you don’t want to spend your whole life with a moron!

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If you like my blog even a little bit, then you should know I do Christian Comedy live shows! It’s all the faith and fun you read here, but on stage, it’s even more hilarious. Hire me for your next corporate bash, church event, or school function, and let’s make it a night of laughs with my unique brand of Christian Comedy!

three little pigs

Three Little Pigs

Three Little Pigs in Shakespeare is available as a children’s book. Get the illustrated story based on my viral comedy routine from Amazon.  Makes a great gift for the word-lovers in your life. 

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4 Responses

  1. You should probably break up a few times throughout the relationship, just in case she could potentially build a case of common law marriage. At least then you can just cite that the relationship is as old as your last reunion.

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