Some people are good at math. I am not one of those people. In school, I was thrilled with a ‘C’ in arithmetic classes. I suspect I passed Algebra class because the teacher wanted to save himself the headache of dealing with my incompetence for another semester.
During a typical, frustrating class session while the teacher scribbled symbols and letters on the chalkboard and called it an ‘equation,’ I muttered, “This makes no sense.” The teacher, equally as frustrated as myself, replied, “It makes sense. You just don’t get it.”
That DID make sense. It remains one of the most important lessons I ever learned. I used to say, “I’ll never use the stuff I learned in Algebra class.” I was wrong.
One of the biggest obstacles to obtaining wisdom is my ego. “This makes no sense,” is an arrogant statement. It assumes that I my comprehension is perfect. It presupposes that I am capable of grasping any truth no matter how complex. Which means, when I don’t understand something, it’s your fault. You didn’t explain yourself in a way that “makes sense.”
I don’t speak Russian. Imagine me walking into a room full of people speaking Russian and proclaiming, “Your babbling doesn’t make any sense!” They would stare blankly at me then murmur to each other (in Russian), ”That guy isn’t making sense.”
“Blib-blub-blub-blub,” was a word one of my grandson’s used when he was learning to talk. He said it one day in his high chair when his mother gave him a peanut butter sandwich. Because mothers are tuned-in to baby frequency, his aunt said, “Wait! Are you saying peanut butter?” He repeated himself and nodded. His ‘babbling’ was not incoherent but only a handful of people on Earth could ‘make sense’ of that word.
In order to avoid becoming an arrogant liar, instead of saying, “You don’t make sense,” I try to remember to say, “I don’t understand you.” The humbling truth is that just because I’m ‘not getting it’ doesn’t mean you’re speaking nonsense.
Admitting that I don’t understand makes me feel stupid. I’d rather blame you for my ignorance. It’s easier on my ego. It’s hard to admit you know things that I don’t. But when I’m full of pride there’s no room for truth. The price of wisdom is ‘feeling stupid’ sometimes.
“and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.”
(Proverbs 2:3)
One Response
“ The humbling truth is that just because I’m ‘not getting it’ doesn’t mean you’re speaking nonsense”
Maybe that should be incorporated into the wedding vows.