There is a technique I often use to find out if the person I’m talking to is honest. It’s quicker than hooking them up to a polygraph machine (because I don’t actually OWN one of those), and the results are just as reliable.

Here’s what I do: I ask people what they believe.

Questions are a dishonest person’s Kryptonite. I discovered this while arguing religion with people who claimed to be atheists. Show me a person who won’t tell you what they believe and I’ll show you a lying liar.

When I wrote about the difference between good religion and lousy religion, I had the following exchange: OTHER: All religion is lousy.

ME: Let me guess…you are “non-religious”, right?

OTHER: Define “religious” and I’ll tell you.

Ta da! This person is a fraud. And it only took ONE question to draw her out! Maybe you’re thinking, “John, you’re kind of a jerk. Why not just define the term for the sake of conversation?” (I will ANSWER your question, because I’m honest.)

She already HAS a definition of ‘religious’ in her mind. Her first comment was, “All religion is lousy.” If she didn’t have an idea of what ‘religion’ is, she wouldn’t know it was lousy. A person won’t say, “All beds are lumpy,” unless they have some concept of what a bed is.

Because I’m gracious, patient, and ever the agreeable chap, I suggested we use whatever definition she likes. It went like this:

ME: Whatever you meant by ‘religious’ when you said, “All religion is lousy.”

OTHER: All I can say is, Religion didn’t die on the cross for us. Don’t you agree?

Notice, she has refused to answer the question twice. Now, she is asking me a question! She wants me to agree that “religion” didn’t die on the cross for us. But alas, I cannot agree. Can you guess why? (I’ll answer that question too!)

She still hasn’t told me what she means by ‘religion.’ I can’t agree or disagree until I know what she’s talking about. Not only is she dishonest, she’s manipulative.

ME: Perhaps it would be more accurate to say, “SOME religions are lousy.” Don’t you agree?

OTHER: Assuming “lousy” means worthless, then I know of no religions that can stand toe to toe with the person of Jesus Christ, hence all religions are lousy. Am I right?

That brings the total to 3 unanswered questions. This time, she has repeated the original claim that “All religions are lousy” and mentioned Jesus by name hoping that will prompt me to agree with her. This is a bit worse than mere dishonesty. This is (by my definition) using the Lord’s name in vain. She is trying to trick me into thinking she’s honoring the name of Christ. In reality, she’s using God to prop-up her original, incorrect statement.

My rule is, “I don’t answer your question until you answer mine.” Refusing to answer my question tells me you’re a lying liar and a bully. I don’t get pushed around by bullies, even when they quote scripture and claim to love Jesus.

The technique works every time. Honest people will answer questions about their beliefs. Dishonest people refuse to answer questions about their beliefs.

It’s as simple as that.

Jesus replied, “I will ask you one question. Answer me, and I will tell you by what authority I am doing these things. John’s baptism—was it from heaven, or from men? Tell me!”

They discussed it among themselves and said, “If we say, ‘From heaven,’ he will ask, ‘Then why didn’t you believe him?’ But if we say, ‘From men’….” (They feared the people, for everyone held that John really was a prophet.)

So they answered Jesus, “We don’t know.”

Jesus said, “Neither will I tell you by what authority I am doing these things.”

Mark 11:29