We’ll probably never know exactly how many people have been killed by the teaching that humans are just evolved monkeys. It’s a big number, though. That’s for sure.

Little kids are taught in school that they’re evolved monkeys. The smart kids eventually figure out what that means and suffer great anguish. “I’m just an animal. I have no purpose for living.”

At this point, somebody will undoubtedly screech, “John, that’s not true! Humans are loaded with purpose! There are sooooooooo many ways to give life meaning!” And because I’m a thoughtful person who understands what you’re trying to say, I’ll allow your point. If you define “purpose” as a personal feeling of significance, then yes, your life can have purpose. But you must be consistent.

You must acknowledge that the monkey’s life is as purposeful as yours. Whatever you’re doing to derive purpose from your existence is not more important than when the monkey flings his poo. Your Nobel Prize is no better than flying feces. Human animals are no more meaningful than monkeys, pandas, cuttlefish, or crickets. Which is what causes smart people such great anguish.

Smart people don’t get any satisfaction from assigning themselves purpose. It’s like sending yourself a birthday card. It’s like leaving yourself a voicemail that says, “You’re amazing!” Significance and purpose can’t be created out of thin air.

The problem for evolved monkeys is that there is NOBODY to give them purpose. Every other living creature is equally purposeless. We’re all just animals. It doesn’t matter whether we cure cancer or squirm in the mud under a rock (or fling poo). And that’s why some evolved monkeys kill themselves. There is no reason NOT to kill themselves.

Listen up, you evolved monkeys! There is no such thing as an evolved monkey. You’re a person made in God’s image. You’re not an animal. You’re much more. You have a soul that lasts forever. Your purpose is to find eternal communion with your Maker.

“For your have delivered me from death and my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before God in the light of life.”

(Psalm 56:13)

Christian Comedy for Hire

If you like my blog even a little bit, then you should know I do Christian Comedy live shows! It’s all the faith and fun you read here, but on stage, it’s even more hilarious. Hire me for your next corporate bash, church event, or school function, and let’s make it a night of laughs with my unique brand of Christian Comedy!

three little pigs

Three Little Pigs

Three Little Pigs in Shakespeare is available as a children’s book. Get the illustrated story based on my viral comedy routine from Amazon.  Makes a great gift for the word-lovers in your life. 

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