Karen’s Accusers
So, I was driving across people’s lawns at 3am, blasting my car stereo and throwing trash out the window when this Karen attacked me. She was screeching something about noise ordinances, and property damage, and littering, and blah, blah, blah. The thing is, I wasn’t even driving on her lawn! She lived on the other […]
This Isn’t Healthcare
Behold, the denizens of darkness gathered to fight for the freedom to make baby smoothies. This is what matters most to them! They sacrifice time and treasure for the cause of obliterating tiny, growing humans. From the lobby of their church they cry out to their congressional deities, “Abortion is healthcare!” They’ve forgotten that the […]
Your Stupid Ancestors
Picture First Century people as drooling simpletons and it makes sense that they were snookered by Jesus. The apostles were conmen and literally every one of the thousands of Christian converts was a dolt. It is easier to doubt the Bible when you think the ancient people were stupid. Those humans who built pyramids, roads, […]
Marriage Is Not Your Job
Dennis Prager suggests that the option of divorce makes marriage better. His reasoning is that people don’t work to improve things they have no fear of losing. He asks, “Who is likely to work harder at a job; someone who knows that they could in fact be fired, or someone who knows that no matter […]
Everyone Is Welcome and Miserable
“There’s not a lot of Jesus in that comment…” That’s what I was told when I made a joke about the life expectancy of a Hollywood marriage. The criticism came from a staff member at a church with a banner that reads, “You Are Welcome Here.” Look, I understand what you’re trying to accomplish. You […]
Now Do You See The Insanity?
Education is an area that Christians often believe to be ‘neutral territory.’ It doesn’t really matter where kids go to school so long as they receive a ‘quality’ education and education is totally separate from ‘religion.’ You believe kids can be immersed in secular education and cultivate a Christian mindset. You believe your kids can […]
That’s Not The Test…
I ignored this little piece of skewed theology the first half dozen times it passed before my eyes but it won’t go away so I’ll make fun of it in hopes that you’ll stop sharing it. Which Judas are you proposing as the test of my Christianity? That was a common biblical name and there […]
Men Are Welcome
Men, you are welcome here. You have work to do. Your loved ones need you to be strong, courageous, and wise. They need you to be selfless, loyal, and unbreakable. They need you to build a safe place for them to live, learn, and love. Evil is quite real. You will be opposed by dark […]
Disney Theology Is Rubbish
I dunno…Maybe there’s no reason that belief in God is plummeting. Maybe you lost your faith because of unseen cosmic forces. Perhaps the tilt of the Earth produces cynicism. Or maybe 5G towers drive people out of church. I’m just speculating. I know that you shouldn’t blame ‘Science’ for your paganism. That would be like […]
Making Peace with Evil
Christians: Before you commit yourself to finding ‘common ground’ with unbelievers, be sure to identify the ground you’re not willing to surrender. One of the most effective methods of creating atheists has been the church’s relentless search for ‘common ground’ with unbelievers. You’ve interpreted Paul’s plea to ‘become all things to all people’ (1 Corinthians […]