Yes! Ban All The Books!
I know you’re upset by the attempt to ban porn from public school but calm down! Nobody is telling you that you can’t give your children smut. We just think it should be left up to parents to decide how much poison their children consume. I try to minimize the amount of harmful material in […]
Education Is Indoctrination
Three cheers for indoctrination! I’m so grateful for my own indoctrination. It has saved me the time of having to learn everything first hand. Thanks to indoctrinations, almost everything I know came from somebody else. I’ve heard some criticism from people who think indoctrination is a bad thing. I’m certain that somebody indoctrinated them with […]
Non-Traditional Wedding
I participated in a wedding yesterday. My buddy and I took his boat to the reservoir, loaded it up with bait and tackle, and spent the whole day catching fish. That’s what I call a beautiful wedding. Some folks say, “That’s not a wedding! That’s called fishing!” Haters gonna hate. I don’t let small minded […]
God Loves You Just The Way You Are
Here’s an important message for the LGBTQ community – You are not lovable. Nobody is lovable but you folks are targeted for information from serpents posing as God’s preachers. Here’s a sample of the serpents’ speaking: “This book is for every LGBTQI+ individual who fears God can’t love them just the way they are, and […]
Your House Is On Fire
So, I was driving across people’s lawns at 3am, blasting my car stereo and throwing trash out the window when this Karen attacked me. She was screeching something about noise ordinances, and property damage, and littering, and blah, blah, blah. The thing is, I wasn’t even driving on her lawn! She lived on the other […]
Karen’s Accusers
So, I was driving across people’s lawns at 3am, blasting my car stereo and throwing trash out the window when this Karen attacked me. She was screeching something about noise ordinances, and property damage, and littering, and blah, blah, blah. The thing is, I wasn’t even driving on her lawn! She lived on the other […]
This Isn’t Healthcare
Behold, the denizens of darkness gathered to fight for the freedom to make baby smoothies. This is what matters most to them! They sacrifice time and treasure for the cause of obliterating tiny, growing humans. From the lobby of their church they cry out to their congressional deities, “Abortion is healthcare!” They’ve forgotten that the […]
Your Stupid Ancestors
Picture First Century people as drooling simpletons and it makes sense that they were snookered by Jesus. The apostles were conmen and literally every one of the thousands of Christian converts was a dolt. It is easier to doubt the Bible when you think the ancient people were stupid. Those humans who built pyramids, roads, […]
Marriage Is Not Your Job
Dennis Prager suggests that the option of divorce makes marriage better. His reasoning is that people don’t work to improve things they have no fear of losing. He asks, “Who is likely to work harder at a job; someone who knows that they could in fact be fired, or someone who knows that no matter […]
Everyone Is Welcome and Miserable
“There’s not a lot of Jesus in that comment…” That’s what I was told when I made a joke about the life expectancy of a Hollywood marriage. The criticism came from a staff member at a church with a banner that reads, “You Are Welcome Here.” Look, I understand what you’re trying to accomplish. You […]