Color Me Racist
No white. Coincidence? Not likely… Gonna try something today. It’s a popular method of attracting attention. Gonna take a shot at being offended. Bear with me. It’s my first time. Here we go… Benjamin Moore paint company is racist! They have paint named “Eggshell White” As a white man, I’m outraged. It offends me to have my […]
Sense Extinction
Father knows best. Ha! Ha! Just kidding! Father knows nothing. Mother knows a bit more. But the wisest among us are surely the children. Babies know whether they’re boys or girls, …or something else. No matter what the doctor wrote on the birth certificate. A medical degree doesn’t make one an authority on gender. Kids know best. […]
For Love of Unicorns
I’ve never seen a live unicorn. Not saying they don’t exist. Relax, Bronies. I’ve just never seen one. Never seen a three year old child with low self esteem. Not saying they don’t exist. Wait. Yes, I am. Someone posted a picture of a three year old girl with a caption underneath that read: “At three, […]
Virgin Colors
It’s time to surrender white wedding dresses. White once signified virginal purity. A bride in white was a vessel of vestal innocence. This antiquated idea desperately needs modernization. Modern brides walk down the aisle in their 3rd trimester of pregnancy. They have their daughters serve as flower girls. Their sons are ring bearers… …or groomsmen. […]
Humiliating Truth
For the record, I don’t take it personally when my shirt is buttoned crooked, my shoe is untied, or my fly is open. Apparently, that makes me odd. More than once, I’ve had someone tell me, “I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but your fly is open.” After I zip up, the person sheepishly […]
Sensitive to My Insensitivity
Those cosmetic catalogs that come in the mail, I don’t read those. Not because cosmetics are bad. Or because I’m against eye shadow. I’m not afraid of mascara. I harbor no hatred for makeup. I’m simply disinterested. That’s it. I don’t use makeup. Never even think about it. Except for when I’m throwing away those […]
Pocket Change and Evolution
Ever found a penny on the ground? It happens from time to time. Ever found a quarter on the ground? Wonder how it got there. Someone pulls something out of a pocket… scatters change on the ground… picks up most of it but misses the quarter. Have you ever found 30,000 coins on the ground? […]
Don’t Ask This
“Tell me what’s going on in your life.” “So I’ll know how to pray for you.” Well, on your knees I suppose. Fold your hands. Maybe bow your head a little. “No. I mean so I’ll know what to pray about.” What to pray is entirely different than how to pray. Asking what to pray […]
8 Things Christians Should Give Up To Reach Unchurched People
If you’re baffled as to why unchurched people aren’t exactly flocking to most churches, then you need to read this article! It has nothing to do rebellion, selfishness, or mankind’s hatred of righteousness. The reason people aren’t flocking to church is because of YOU! If you expect to reach unchurched people you need to quit […]
How To Know Who To Kill
We agree that cold blooded killings should be rare, right? If driving your car into crowds of people is something you do often… …you need to be more introspective. (That means, consider your motives and thoughts.) Let’s conduct a little thought experiment. Suppose you hear that somebody intentionally drove a car into a crowd of […]